Stand Up - Red Lobster Theory

A friend of mine has this theory that he calls the "Red Lobster Theory" and it goes like this. Red Lobster just isn't very good. And we know it's not that good. But, like, once a year we see a commercial on TV and we think "ooh, that looks awesome" so we go to Red Lobster and then we remember why we haven't gone in a year. And I thought it was a great theory until I realized that my "friend" who was telling it was talking about me. I'M Red Lobster. What the fuck, dude?